Here is another valuable item I retrieved while at Master’s.  Dr. John MacArthur says he keeps it on his desk to regularly remind himself on the essence of self-sacrificing love.   The source is unknown:

“When you are forgotten or neglected or purposely set at naught and you sting and hurt with the insult of the oversight, but your heart is happy being counted worthy to suffer for Christ – that is dying to self.
When your good is evil spoken of, when your wishes are crossed, your advice disregarded, your opinions ridiculed and you refuse to let anger raise in your heart, or even defend yourself, but take it all in patient loving silence – that is dying to self.
When you lovingly bear any disorder, any irrgularity or any annoyance, when you can stand face to face with waste, folly extravagance, spiritual insensibiliyt, and enudre as Jesus endured it – that is dying to self.
When you are content with any food, any offering, any raiment, and climate, any society, any attitude, any interruption by the will of God – that is dying to self.
When you never care to refer to yourself in conversation, or to record your own good works, or itch after commendation, when you an truly love to be unkonwn – that is dying to self.
When you see your brother propster and have his needs met and can honestly rejoice with him in spirit and feel no ency nor question God, while your own needs are far greater in desperate circumstances – that is dying to self.
When you can receive correction well as outwardly, finding no rebellion or resentment risint up within your heart – that is dying self.”

After writing that I am very convicted.  I do not die to myself as I ought – quiet the opposite in fact!  This quote really marks what it means to be Christ-like and die to self.  I could go on about the impact this has made in my own heart and life, but I will just let the poem speak for itself.

I have recently read some of my college notebooks that were used for note taking in chapel, church, and personal reading.  It has made me very thankful for the education I received and the recourse’s I was exposed too during that time.  One of the sermons that I listened too was on “Spiritual Reconciliation – Application of James 4.7-10″  I didn’t write down the speakers name, but I did keep his handout listing some God-honoring ways to avoid & resolve conflicts.  The following is the key points he made:

Remember – Christ wants our undivided devotion.  The purpose of spiritual reconciliation is God’s glory, not our own selfishness.

I. Some God-honoring ways to Avoid Conflicts:
I Peter 3.7 – seek to know your friend well – appreciate them and their perspective.
Proverbs 18.13, 17 – Don’t answer before you hear – gather plenty of data before speaking.
Proverbs 15.28 – If possible, pray, study & think about the issue before speaking – Respond                         righteously and use soft words of edification not speaking down to them.
Romans 12.9-10 – Demonstrate and/or communicate your love and care at the time of disagreement.
James 1.19 – LISTEN MORE than you speak, but when you do speak – speak the truth in “love”
Ephesians 4.15 – In matters of sin, approach your friend in love
Romans 12.10 – In matters of preference, prefer your friend
Proverbs 11.14; II Timothy 2.15 – In matters of wisdom and conscience, suggest search the                     Scriptures and get godly counsel.
Proverbs 8.6-8 – REFUSE TO SIN IN YOUR COMMUNICATION!
Joshua 22.5; Romans 15.2 – Be more interested in God’s glory and the other’s good, rather than having your own way, or being right.

II. Biblical ways to Resolve Conflicts:
I John 1.9-10 – Confess any sin that you are aware of to God.
Epehesians 4.32; James 5.16 – Go to the offended person, ask forgiveness for each thing you did                specifically and discuss your plan not to do those things again.
Proverbs 15.28 – Express a desire to resolve the conflict fully and decide together when the best time               to do that would be.  And come together at that appointed time.
Proverbs 16.32; James 1.5 – Pray together for God’s wisdom, self-control and speech.
Epehsians 4.15, 26-32; James 1.19 – Reviews God’s rules of communication:
 - speak the truth in love – keep current – attack the problem NOT the person – act don’t react
Ephesians 4.32; James 5.16; I John 1.9 – Each one should take a turn to confess any sin that has not             been confessed – to God or friends – and ASK forgiveness.
Discuess the issues that precipitated the conflict, get details; TAKE TURNS while deciding what you can agree on and what do not agree on; decide what issue(s) you are dealing with and TAKE TURNS offering input on it – is it preference? Sin? Conscience? Wisdom? Etc.  FOLLOWED BY discussing specific steps to resolve the issue(s).  And TOGETHER begin to carry out the appropriate steps. 
END YOUR TIME TOGETHER WITH PRAYER AND AN EXPRESSION OF LOVE! 
Reminder: It is a process and no one can do it without God’s grace (James 4.6)

I was so convicted even writing down the adivce and steps that need to be taken to resolve conflict.  No human in this world ever went without having conflicts – it is impossible with sin.  I really think if we approached conflict in such a God-honoring manner there would be less conflict, and more reconciliation that occurs.  Even as I was typing what he said, my flesh cried out “WoW – that is going to be very hard to actually do!  Pray with someone that is upset with me before we even talk?”  But the more I thought about it the more I realized that allows Christ to be the central focus and the common ground between the two of us.  He has the power to work in both our lives. 

The speaker didn’t comment on humility as much as I thought he would, but really the entire process is putting flesh aside and putting Christ and a fellow follower of Christ first.  Humility and dependence of God is the foundation for resolving any conflict. 

       

 

 

 

One of the subjects that I have recently become interested while attending Southern Seminary is that of infertility.  Recently, a godly woman whose husband works at the Seminary shared her testimony as an infertile woman.  What she said was very beneficial to anyone in ministry.  We talked for over an hour, and unfortunately the richness of that could not be put in one blog.  So here are some key highlights – take note pastors, counselors and the ministry minded – and keep in mind that 1 in 6 couples experience infertility!  Please keep in mind that the husband and wife experience and express their grief in many different ways (more on that in days to come).  This blog specifically addresses “WHAT NOT TO SAY” to a couple experiencing infertility.

 ”Have you thought of adoption?” – the question seems simple, and hopeful, yet for those in the midst of the grief associated with infertility it is a slap in the face.  ‘of course we have considered adoption’ is the usual thoughtful response (though hardly anyone would voice it).  It is a generic, impersonal question often given to fill the silence.  Please don’t assume you are shedding light on the issue by suggesting an obvious alternative (that is what it seems like).

“Oh! You & your husband are DINK’s” – This was said to the couple after a brief encounter with someone they just met.  DINK’s – Double Income No Kids.  The truth of the matter is the couple you may be talking to may be trying very hard to have children.

“At least you have fun trying” – This is not true of any couple who are trying to have children and have been diagnosed as infertile.

“The Lord has deemed me worthy” – This was said by a pregnant woman to this couple, seemingly indicating that pregnancy is granted to those who are worthy of God’s blessing. 

“Mothers Day” – Be careful and sensitive on days like Mother’s Day or Father’s Day.  Often times many infertile couples won’t even attend church on those days because all of the mother’s stand up or get a rose.  While those who are trying to have children and are unable to receive nothing but painful reminders.

 Don’t shun those who are infertile.  Often times many people run away from them, as if they have a contagious disease.  It’s not a disease but a trial. 

Be encouraging – which sometimes means KEEPING YOUR MOUTH SHUT & YOUR EARS OPEN.  Don’t be afraid to dive into the couple’s lives, being honest about not always knowing what to say.  Be sensitive to their needs and hurts.  And be ready for the long hall! It will often be a life long – at least multi-year experience. 

This Bible interview has been inspired by Rick Holland during his message entitled “The three I’s of the Bible” www.crossroadsministry.net ) In this message Rick retorically asks us to think about our Bible reading time for that week.  “If your Bible was to be interviewed what would it say about it’s owner?”  Going on Rick says “Monday I was thought of, brought with them to the car but laid on the dash board where my binding and cover began to curl.  Tuesday I was placed on the table with another book over me to straighten out my cover.  Wednesday my spine was stretched, and a Psalms was read.  Thursday I was placed on the table for later reading.  Friday I was moved to be dusted.  Saturday I was put on the bed, under a pile of clothes.  Sunday I was screaming because I couldn’t be found to be brought to church.  I was under the pile of clothes from the night before.”  Sadly enough, it sounds like my Bible reading week. 

 One of the purposes of this blog was to receive accountability.  Lord willing, I will conduct a Bible interview every week, to see my priorities or lack there of.  Humbly this is my first weeks interview.

Monday – I was put in the carry on travel bag to be read on the plane, another book was chosen over me.  I was not opened on Monday even though the other reading contained my word, it was not written out.

Tuesday – I was opened during chapel and class, but I did not spend personal time with my owner.

Wednesday – I was opened during Bible study where they studied Psalms. 

Thursday – I was opened and read during chapel.

Friday – A Pslams was read before bed.

Saturday – …

My knees were used even less frequently…my thoughts drift to “imparting a passion” – listen to it and you will know where I mean.

~ the humbled ~

5:30  – “beep beep beep” – my alarm goes off, waking me after 5 hours of sleep. 

6:00 – I, along with my dad, head towards downtown Louisville to see the start of the Ford Iron Man.

6:50 – “Fire” the first shot is fired allowing the awaiting professional iron man racers to leep of the dock into the water to begin their race. 

7:00 – “Fire” – shot number 2.  This one allows the rest of the participants to begin their 2.8 mile swim in the Ohio River.

 Today, over 2000 racers were able to take part in the Ford 2007 Iron Man Triatholon.  For those of you who don’t know much about this incredible race, let me enlighten you.  It consist of three things:
1) a 2.4 mile swim 2) 112 mile bike ride 3) 26.6 mile run. 

There were about 200 “Professional” triathletes there today (possibly more – the crowds were to gathered for me to see)  This morning I was able to watch the very beginning of the race.  I was mixed right in with the participants who were weaved in and out of railings and sidewalks awaiting their turn to jump into the Ohio River.  I saw a mixture of athelets there.  There stood about a 5.1 men to women ratio (women wore blue swimming caps and men wore red).  I saw a variety of “lean-ness”.  What I mean by that is, appearance wise, I was questioning some who were going to attempt to finish this race.  They did not look like they could run a flight of stairs, let along a Iron Man.  There were others who were would serve an anatomy teacher well – they could be used to demonstrate every muscle in the body – especially those in the arms and legs.   I saw short men and women, tall men and women.  For a while I stood next to a women with three children, who was there to support her husband.  I saw many couples competing together, even a homosexual couple competing together.  It really was awesome to be around such awesome athletes. 

After most got into the water, my dad and I briskly walked to the “transition 1″ station.  This is where the athletes were to immerge from the water, sprint to grab their T1 bags, run to the dressing room, sprint to their bikes and take off for a 112 miles.  Their T1 bags were full of whatever was needed for this new transition – Gu, socks, sun glasses, etc.  By the time we got over to that area we saw the first swimmer running towards his bike and take off in a matter of seconds.  He had his shoes already attached to the foot pettals, his helmet upside down, and glasses all in place.  We stood and watched the athletes transition for about 40 minutes.  It was incredible. 

My dad continued the day by driving to see the bikers at their turning point. I went home, changed and went to church.  About 3pm my sister and I went down town to meet my dad, and hopefully see the first finisher.  And we were able to.  I actually stood 3 feet away from the finish line!  The first place winner, James McDonalle (? On spelling) made it in under 9 hours.  I think the exact time was 8:48:53 or something around those numbers.  three minutes later the second place winner came through.  About 3 minutes after that the third place winner – an American and FIRST TIME IRON MAN participant came through.   What a great race.

 These three really demonstrated true, steller athleticism!  They were the ipetimy of “buffeting their body”.  Unfortunately I do not believe it was done to the glory of Jesus Christ.  As great as a feeling of winning the Iron Man must have been, what happens now?  What does he do tonight?  He drives away with his new car, and feels satisfied for how long? 

When Paul calls us to “buffet our body into submission” he is referring to the Christian life, and to discipline for the purpose of Godliness.  Godliness for an ETERNAL purpose.  Not a purpose that is fleeting and fading.  I learned a lot today.  I learned that anyone with time could devote themselves to particiapte in an IRON MAN.  I learned what it meant to endure and pursevere until the finish line – almost 9 hours of incredible performance that is very demanding upon the body.  Yet if this is not done for the purpose of glorifying God who gave us an incredible body, then it is pointless and vanity. 

But what glory and lessons can be learned from such an event.  I have a few that were already shared. 

It seems the past couple of days I have been bombarded between paradox that exist in my life.  This one is not very different from the last post I wrote (A disconnect between knowledge and actions).  However, this really focuses on the my struggle with sanctification.

For a couple of months I have been “training” for a mini marathon (13.1 miles).  For anyone that knows me well, they know I am not a big runner.  Before I went to college I could barely run 2 miles.  After college/during my senior year at college I could run about 3 miles.  During my training I completed a little over 4 miles at the set deadline I gave myself.  I then thought I was going to be fine from then on.  I hit my “goal” and I began to stop taking running so seriously.  I came up with more and more excusses to stop running, thinking I was going to be fine, and would still be able to run the marathon.  Through out history NOT ONE PERSON HAS BEEN ABLE TO THINK THEMSELVES INTO SHAPE.  IT TAKES ACTION!  It takes action – discipline, focus, drive, and attention.  It is not just going to happen because I want it to.  It is going to take hard work, every day discipline.  I think this is also very applicable to the Christian life. 

Paul compares the Christian life to a race – it is hard, it takes discipline and endurance!  It takes ACTION – and just with the marathon I cannot think myself into godliness.  I must work at it!  I must discipline myself to read and mediate and devour my Bible.  I  my discipline my mind, I must focus all my thoughts, actions and attention on the Lord.  I must be faithful in prayer.  I must pray that He continues to grow me into the likeness of His image!  It takes action and practice and hard work – just like training for race, I am training for life!

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.  ~I Corinthians 9.24

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin wich clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith!    ~ Hebrews 12.1-2a

Someone once said “You live out your theology”.  While this may be encouraging to some, to me it has been a sentence of frustration.  I know it is true, yet what I see in my actions discourages me to no end.   I think mostly of my work place.  My God given job is to help others, to keep people clean, to assist them in everyday tasks that need to be done to live – at least comfortably.  My job is to help out others that I work with, my title is technically “Patient Care Associate” – but everywhere else in the country entitles the job “Certified Nursing Assistant“.  It is my job to help out the patients AND the nurses.  I work with a group of unsaved individuals who seem to have nothing better to do than to gossip about the floor managers, complain about their lack of pay, announce bitter and annoyed thoughts towards the patients (the ones we have come to help!). 

 I have heard countless times from non-believers that the reason they want to be a nurse is to “help people” – I often hear them say “I enjoy helping others”.  From what I have seen in this work force, that is not the case.  One nurse simply said “Yeah, and the fact you make twenty plus an hour has nothing to do with it”.  No one would do this job for free, or less pay.  For me, there seemed to be a type of romance involved in being a nurse.  Many have fantasies about being taken care of by a dark and handsome doctor than falls madly in love with you the moment you see them.  Then Reality hits – most doctors are foreign, middle aged, and have minimal contact with the patients.  As for nurses, we hope to fall in love with a dark handsome patient who is very thankful for the great care we give them, as they look marvelously great in their uniform (there was an awe and romance about nurses who served during the war). 

What does all this mean?  What was previously mentioned could serve as an excuse as to my current attitude about my job.  A “standoffish – I want to blend in – don’t make me stand out” attitude.  It even goes deeper than that!  Let’s call sin what it is: sin.  My attitude at work has been dishonoring to the Lord.  I have an attitude that is not helpful to others, an impatience towards patients (except the ones that give me some sort of a reason to be nice to them – they are either nice to me, or they don’t bother me).  My attitude doesn’t honor or respect the authority placed over me: the charge nurses or the managers.  I think my way is right and that’s all there is to it.  My attitude reflects pride, anger and discontentment.  Sound harsh?  Again – lets call sin what sin is.

How does all of this reflect my theology?  My mind was wondering while going through my tasks as a PCA, I began to think about the degree I may obtain (Lord willing) in the future.  I may be granted to obtain 2 BAs and a MABC before I’m 27.  And you know what thought followed that:  VANITY.  ALL IS VANITY.  Why is this Vanity?  Because my actions even now do not reflect the knowledge I currently have.  There is a disconnect between my knowledge and my actions.  In other words I am not living out my theology.  Or am I? 

The answer to the question is yes – I am indeed living out my theology.  But there seems to be more of disconnect between my knowledge (known theology) and my heart.  My heart it hard – I fear man more than I fear people.  God says to honor and respect the authority placed over you (commanded to the men and women who were being KILLED for believing in God).  God says to love others as MORE IMPORTANT than yourself.  God says to honor Him and worship Him and glorify Him through everything we SAY and everything we DO!  God says to avoid foolish talking and gossip.  God says to TRUST HIM and BE CONENT where HE has you.  God says not to complaign about things.  God says that LOVE for others is the second greatest commandment, but LOVE FOR GOD is the greatest! 

What does all this mean? – It means my theology has been plagued by sin, but my God is greater than all my sin.  He can change me, help me honor Him, and be glorified by the process! Thank You Lord!

    
        War of Words: Getting to the Heart of Your Communication Struggles              
  By: Paul David Tripp

                         Summary: Words are used at every moment of everyday.  Humans ability to communicate using words distinguish us from any other creature on this planet.  Words are, arguably, the most powerful tools for warfare we have.  Think about your day: were you hurt by someone because of what they said or didn’t say?  Did you hurt someone?  Were you involved in a argument or fight where all that was thrown were hurling, bitter, argry words? Words are powerful and they can change another person instantly: they can make someone who was sad – happy.  One who was happy – angry.  They hurt, encourage, curse, praise, be used sweetly or be full of bitterness.  Because words serve as a communication tool – wouldn’t it be nice to figure out to communicate in an effective way for the Lord?  A way that is honoring to Him?  A way the repairs situations instead of waring them appart?  That is what Paul David Tripp addresses in this book “Communication problems reveal a much deeper and fundamental level” – our heart!  

Quotes:

I have been wanting to start my own “Blog site” for a while now, hoping to keep friends updated on what is going on in my life.  To encourage those who visit it, and share about the wonderful things the Lord continues to teach me. 

I have an amazing opportunity to sit under continual, Biblical teaching.  This means that many of my writings will “stem” off of their original thoughts.  My goals & desires for the site include:

1) Giving glory to God
     – through my need to be disciplined (as I can tell this may end up being more of a distraction than a benefit) 
     – by giving Him credit for all these great things He is teaching me.

2) Keeping friends updated on my walk with the Lord

3) To have my thoughts continually challeneged as I am now held accountable for what I write on this site – to write with clarity & conviction, with truth & grace.

4) To be encouraging to those who may not have the resources (teaching, books, etc) that I currently am blessed with.

5) To be real and honest in my desire and strive to “Keep the Faith”.